Deborah in Conversation

Keeping Hope Alive

2012-01-18T11:29:00.006+02:00

I've been struggling these past few days...
Struggling to stay focused
Struggling to smile
Struggling to remember the good things in my life

It's just way too easy to have a pity party I find
And this frustrates me no end...
"you have so much to be thankful for"
I find myself saying over and over again
"look around you"
I say as I drive through a predominantly
coloured gang infested...
drug soaked township on my way to work

And it is exactly this dichotomy of my life that frustrates me
The poverty and hopelessness I see around me
leaves me inspired to share my message of hope
but it also drags me down into a dark pit of gloom and self-pity

When I see boys as young as twelve smoke and drink behind a wall
and little girls dance suggestively just a few meters away them
I know what the outcome is going to be
And I pray for those little girls to be able to hold onto their innocence
for just a few more years
just until someone...
a teacher... an older sister... or cousin...
comes along and tells them there is more to life
More to life than smoking
and drinking
and boys
and dancing
and sex

"The children don't want to listen to us"
say my staff at work.
I share my story
and that of my grandmother with them
I'm doing what I can... where I can
In the hope that they will share that message with their children
But apparently pretty words can't compete with the good feelings
drugs and alcohol and sex provide

And my frustration and impatience sends me tumbling into a
deep dark vacuum
What good was my suffering if I cant help others lead a better life?
What purpose did it serve?

I feel a therapy session coming on...

Thank goodness for my support system!

I'm finished... and running out of time...

2012-01-08T14:07:00.006+02:00

I’m so finished with the intolerance I encounter in my country...
I’m finished with us failing to listen to each other...
Let’s stop being defensive and sensitive about the actions of our previous government.
Let’s face it... we were born into a society that believed white skins were superior to black skins...
We had no choice in the matter and some of us benefited from that whether we bought into that ideology or not.
Let’s acknowledge that the shit happened and let’s listen to the stories being told...
But let us not flash that race card indiscriminately when we should in fact be discussing our prejudice and ignorance about each other’s cultures.
I’m so finished with us fleeing “racist” Cape Town instead of facing and challenging the racism head on.
Why wait until a twitter spat erupts to tell of our traumatic experiences?
Have we learnt nothing from the men and women who stood their ground and fought gallantly for our democratic freedom?

I’m so finished with us taking the easy way out that the cyber world offers us when it comes to our relationships.
I’m finished with being defriended on facebook and blocked on twitter because you feel uncomfortable about something I said.
I see way too many of us doing the exact same thing in relationships... a click on our keyboard is much easier than working at a relationship.
Relationships build communities... communities build a nation.
But with relationships come vulnerability... people get to see our imperfections.
And that scares us.
So we block and defriend people instead of taking the opportunity to embrace our vulnerabilities and grow.
In so doing we miss out on being able to truly engage in our lives, our relationships, our communities and our country from a place of authenticity and a feeling of worthiness.
Without a strong sense of worthiness we are unable to connect and experience a sense of belonging and this has a knock-on effect in all facets of our lives.
I’m finished with us feeling that we are not worthy of love, belonging and joy.

I’m so finished with the taboo that surrounds speaking up against woman and child abuse.
I’m finished with the deafening silence from all the good men in our country who said very little about those 56 272 women who reported being raped in our country last year.
And I’m even more finished with the fact that we have the highest reported cases of rape per capita in the whole wide world.
I’m finished with the publisher who told me that they cannot publish my book because they do not want to become known as the publisher who publishes books about abuse.
And even more...
I’m finished with myself for buying into the taboo and actually waiting for the 16 Days of Activism to roll around so that I can bang on my drum about the abuse that women and children endure in my country.

I’m so finished with being finished in 2012...

We need to slow down in order to keep up

2012-01-03T07:33:00.006+02:00

Most of us tend to rush through our days at break-neck speed. We try and cram into our day as much as we can. Doing a lot makes us feel good. And then we find ourselves at the end of the year... looking back and wondering... was it worth it?

I have resolved to slow down this year. To make it about the quality of my life and not the quantity I manage to cram into each day.

And yes... I'm excited about 2012. I even found myself saying that I cannot wait for 2012 to be over so that I can sit back and be proud of myself and thank everybody who helped me reach my goals. But I also want to savour 2012... it's gonna be a good year... and like all good things I want it to linger. I want to take it all in... I want to savour each magic moment.

But old habits die hard... and I will have to relearn stuff I was taught by one of my "teachers" who helped me along this healing journey of mine. She taught me to start my day off with a clear mind.

I find that my mental chatter keeps me distanced from my inner awareness... All that chatter leaves me feeling confused and disorientated. By taking just a few minutes at the beginning of my day to turn within and let go of scattered thoughts... I immediately begin to feel more alert with a stronger sense of awareness of the possibilities and opportunities that present themselves for me to be all I am meant to be during my day.

And so.... on this first day of work in 2012... I hope you too can slow down and enjoy all you are meant to in this life we share.

It has been a while.

2011-11-12T14:14:00.001+02:00

I have been inspired to start blogging again.
I will be back soon...
I promise!

2009-02-03T07:33:00.002+02:00

Baby Steps...

I have long learnt that I have to do something first
before I can receive
and that often means putting myself on the line
"Doing" is risky business...
We have to step out in faith...
We have to act on our belief...

I write everything down
But I have found that a written plan is worthless
unless I act upon it
It is only when I take action that I see and experience results...

All we need to do is take that first baby step...

2009-02-02T07:37:00.002+02:00

A New Day...

Very often I find myself holding on very tightly
to what I have and I probably miss out on
some great opportunities for growth...

I find evidence of this in so many areas of my life
I hold onto a bad habit knowing full well that it is bad for me
I experience the negative effects
but I continue doing nothing about it

Sometimes I will make a half hearted attempt to change or to stop...
but I never really put my all into tackling the situation
In theory I know all the answers
I know exactly what steps I should take
But somehow I just never get it right...

There is however hope for me
because today is a new day
and I still have breath in me
and another day to try once more...

2009-01-29T07:14:00.002+02:00

Love Thyself...

Leo Tolstoy said - "If one has no vanity in this life of ours
there is no sufficient reason for living"
And at first glance that quote does not make sense
But think of it this way...
In order to love those around us we first need to love ourselves!
Giving ourselves unconditional love makes it easier
to extend compassion to those around us
In fact... we should be "vain" in our self love as Tolstoy suggests

And then... and only then will we be more accepting of others
and even find it easier to be more tolerant of them

Because lets face it...
sometimes it is so hard loving those who hurt us...
And people who love themselves are less inclined to be
hurtful to others around them...

2009-01-28T07:00:00.002+02:00

Dreams are good Friends...

As I have said before - our desires and dreams act as fuel
They thrust us toward new horizons
Without having something to strive for
we get stuck in ruts because we are
unsure of what to do next...

Goals are the dreams that we are willing to work for
When we set goals and write them down
we take responsibility for our lives
Even if we only take small steps
we are actively pursuing our goals
just daydreaming about them will get us nowhere
and having goals that we have written down
make us feel good because it adds a sense of purpose
and direction to our lives...

2009-01-27T07:09:00.002+02:00

Putting Pen to Paper...

I have plans
in fact.... I'm always planning and scheming
But I have found when I think about my plans
without sitting down to put pen to paper
the ideas just seem to float around in my head
and nothing happens...

Being clear about my objectives help me stay focused
I find that I have to set aside time to create a clear plan
and assess all my options

It’s good to write things down so you don’t overlook anything
And once the list is complete
I take time to consider the possibilities
and drawbacks of each choice so that I can determine
where I should focus my attention

Look before you leap.... we are always told
Having a clear idea of what we want in life...
considering all the possibilities open to us...
and then making a decision
can make a big difference in our efforts

2009-01-26T07:49:00.002+02:00

When Opportunity Knocks...

Yesterday I read a blog where a young lady
expressed her frustration about not getting the break she needs
"What do I do to let people notice my potential" she said

I fully understand her frustration
but we are co-creators of our destiny I believe
and I believe that our job is to be prepared when opportunity knocks
We need to be at the right place
at the right time
with the right equipment
if we want to make things happen for us

And not every opportunity is our opportunity either...
But we cannot sit back and hope something will drop into our lap...
Also... we never know who we are going to meet next
The very next person we talk to could be
our ticket to an exciting future
Will you be ready for your opportunity?

Someone once said...
“It’s better to be prepared for an opportunity
and not have one, than to have an opportunity
and not be prepared.”

We all need to be ready when our opportunity knocks...

2009-01-22T07:31:00.002+02:00

One Step at a Time...

It is only when we are willing to listen to our self
and be fearless
that figuring out our next step becomes easy...

Underneath the fear, hesitation and uncertainty
lies our inner knowing that always knows
which step we need to take next...

Our lives are made up of a network of pathways
that we can choose to move from one phase of our lives to the next...
Some of us have smooth clearly marked paths
While others have more difficulty in seeing their way clearly

But ultimately we always know whats right for us
only we know which path to choose
but we need to tune into our inner voice
Our inner council...
And THAT...
is the difficult part

We need to make time for ourselves
we need to be still and tune in to our inner council
our little voice
our dreams
our passions
because those are the things that light up the way of our paths in life...

2009-01-21T06:49:00.002+02:00

Wise Words...

“A man must be big enough to admit his mistakes

smart enough to profit from them

and strong enough to correct them”

- Anonymous

2009-01-20T06:14:00.002+02:00

Gratitude...

One of the things in life I have lots of difficulty with
as a result from my childhood sexual abuse is TRUST...
and I find that I often second guess peoples motive
when they do something for me...

"What do they want from me" is always my first reaction
I have to consciously take a step back from those thoughts and
remind myself that I no longer need to "protect"
myself from people... and that those close and dear to me
offer support that is given with complete love
without expecting anything in return
They help me for no other reason
simply because of the intensity of their caring

And I have found that
giving words of thanks in a heartfelt manner
is one of the best ways to return their kindness
I have to connect with the energy of my heart
when I convey my gratitude
and I have to accept in the same way
in which I have received the gifts
—without expecting anything in return

Saying thanks from my heart is the only way I am able to
let my loved ones know the true depth of my appreciation

And there is so much I need to be grateful for in my life...

2009-01-16T06:23:00.002+02:00

Positive Reactions...

We cannot control what other people do
but it is very important to recognize that we
have control over our reactions to situations

When we hold onto the actions of others
we are reacting in a way that is neither positive nor healthy

When we have control over ourselves
there is no way others can control us
and by learning how to react to others in a positive way
we will feel a greater sense of self-empowerment...

2009-01-15T06:07:00.005+02:00

Our Actions Speak Louder...

Why is it that sometimes when someone wants something
their actions seem to tell a different story?
It's like when someone wants better health
but they end up working too hard and not having time for gym...

Someone else might want a loving relationship
but instead they spends most evenings watching television...
Another person may want their own business
but they end up staying in a job that's safe....

Unconscious motivations drive behavior
It's not that they are not motivated –
it's just that their motivation is pushing them in a different direction

So how do we fix that?

We have to become aware of those unconscious motivations
and of what's really driving our life
Then we have to rid ourselves of old limiting beliefs
that are keeping us from our true desires

Only when we are in that new space of clarity and freedom
are we able to allow new possibilities to emerge in our lives

2009-01-14T07:03:00.004+02:00

Crunch Time...

We were all born for a purpose

that the world desperately needs us to fulfil

Each and every one of us...

But so many of us sit around wondering and asking

"What is my purpose?"

"Why am I here on this earth?"

"Why am I suffering so much?"

The big thing however is -

We need to show up

We need to get off our behinds and start doing

what we were born to do..

(And if you by now have still not figured that out then contact me...)

We need to stop making excuses

We need to stop blaming others or our circumstances

We need to find our passion

and stop doing what we hate

and begin doing what we love

The power to change is in our hands...

It is merely a decision away...

2009-01-13T07:09:00.002+02:00

Pity Party

We all have days when the bad things seem to outweigh the good ones
and we begin to think that life is not fair...

We begin to feel like the victim destined for a terrible life
and most of the thoughts that run through our mind
at that stage are not helpful
and they mainly make us feel even worse
and powerless

When I have a terrible day
I make sure I find some time and place to
wallow in my feelings so I can process them
I find that it's very important not to pretend that I am fine
when I am not...
It is very necessary to fully express my emotions
and not feel guilty... or ashamed...
I also find that it helps when I write down my feeling

A definite no-no is to dwell on unpleasant experiences
and avoid holding on to negative emotions
When we indulge in self-pity we only make a bad day worse
My advice is to stop feeling sorry for yourself
get rid of the idea that you are a victim
and focus the good that exists in your life....

2009-01-12T06:05:00.000+02:00

Monday Motivator...

"The secret of making something work in your lives is,
first of all, the deep desire to make it work;
then the faith and belief that it can work;
then to hold that clear definite vision in your consciousness
and see it working out step by step,
without one doubt or disbelief."
- Eileen Caddy

2009-01-09T06:35:00.002+02:00

Beneath the Surface...

I believe strongly that everything we need to be
successful and happy lies within...
But often...
life’s debris accumulates...
building layers around our true authentic self
and this makes it difficult to access the truth that is within us all

One blockage that stops us from going beneath
the surface is our mind - we worry about stuff that is essentially
non important...
We spend more time getting our to do list done
and very little time on just being...

Another blockage to our core is our hearts...
Here we harbour all our past hurts and disappointments
And these prevent us from looking deep within...

We need to be able to deal with those layers
in order to get to our core...
our true essence...
if ever we wish to live a life of success and happiness...

2009-01-07T22:31:00.003+02:00

I watched Oprah today...

And I had a bit of an Aha-moment...
The wheel turned so to speak...

The topic was Spirituality
and one of her guest -
a Man of the Cloth I must add - said
"Being gay is a gift from God"
And being Catholic I initially had major guilt issues
about my sexuality...
But I eventually figured out that I was happy and content
being who and what I was...

But never had I thought of it as a "gift"
and it so clearly is...
because I probably would never had spent so much time
trying to figure out what life and human beings are all about
had it not been for my sexuality...

The Wise One had a plan...

2009-01-06T21:05:00.002+02:00

Ignorance is Bliss...

There are many things in life that I do not know

and there are many things I have no interest in finding out

I have found that when I admit that I don't know something

I open myself up to the opportunity to learn something new

Let's face it...

We can’t possibly know everything

And when we think we do

we are limiting ourselves...

Stopping ourselves from growing and learning more

Someone who can admit to not knowing

is definitely more confident than someone

who pretends to know everything...

They also tend to be more comfortable

with who they are and don’t feel the need to bluff

or cover up any perceived ignorance

Just be yourself...

2009-01-05T21:52:00.002+02:00

Food For Thought...

This is a picture I took of one of my dessert plates on Christmas Day
Yes... ONE of the plates...
I had several
And as a result - I've decided to join Oprah
on yet another quest to loose weight

And this time around
both Oprah and I
should give ourselves the love we are craving
instead of stuffing our faces with food -
That's what Bob Green says...

But Bob Green has never been fat...
so what does he know?

I think I have figured this fat thing out though...

When one looses weight the fat is "ejected"
for want of a better word from your fat cells
But the fat cells remain...
the body can never get rid of a fat cell - that's a fact!

and so... when you are not looking
they - the fat cells - suck up every ounce of fat that enters your mouth
and sometimes when you just look at a chocolate bar
the fat is absorbed through your eyeballs

And when you smell your favourite food being cooked
your nose absorbs the fat and deposits it into your fat cells

I know this to be true because I'm not a big eater
I promise...
except for special occasions...
like Christmas lunch...
But come January -
and I have to go on yet another diet...

Oprah... help... please!!!!!

2008-12-19T07:51:00.002+02:00

I will be putting my feet up and taking a break for two weeks...

"There's one rare and priceless gift that cannot be sold or bought - It's something poor or rich can give, for it's a loving thought. - Helen Steiner Rice

May we all have loving thoughts over this festive season.

2008-12-18T07:48:00.002+02:00

Be not afraid of greatness.

Some are born great,

some achieve greatness,

and some have greatness thrust upon 'em

- William Shakespeare ( Twelfth Night)

And some of us are working hard at it... :-)

2008-12-17T07:40:00.002+02:00

In the long run,
we get no more than we have been willing to risk giving.
- Sheldon Kopp

2008-12-15T08:43:00.002+02:00

Winners never quit...

Not everything we have to do to reach our goal is pleasant

Sometimes we will encounter stuff we dislike doing

People will let us down...

Things just don't go according to plan

We become frustrated and irritated

And we come pretty close to throwing the towel in...

But when we overcome our desire to give up

when we resist going after something easier

Only then do we see the results

Only then do we see our personal growth

Winners never quit...

2008-12-12T06:28:00.002+02:00

Pretty me...

We all have the ability to be attractive

regardless of our appearance

Some people... not all... who are physically attractive

become boring when we get to know them

because they don’t take the time to build character

or substance behind that pretty facade

Those of us who were not born pretty seem to

learn how to be a well balanced person who connects to others

we are often referred to as the person with a

"great personality"

And that is great because...

we take the time to live a balanced life

we find time to pursue our goals

and seek to live life to our full potential

and we learn the fullness of who we are

and we also have more to share with others

Today I'm gonna be all I can be

I'm gonna be attractive...

and appealing...

by sharing my enthusiasm for life

with everybody around me...

2008-12-11T06:17:00.002+02:00

Enthusiasm and Passion...

I find that when I am enthusiastic about something

when I am passionate about something

my interest levels

and concentration levels are much higher

And...

as a result

I seem to be able to find out far more information

and make more discoveries about the subject

and achieve more

than in those things that I am not enthusiastic about

When we have enthusiasm and passion

we are lead to new and exciting discoveries

Enthusiasm and passion gets us out our comfort zones

it enables us to go that extra mile

and it makes a big difference

in our attitude

our commitment

and to the final results we achievement

I am going to be enthusiastic and passionate about today...

2008-12-10T07:43:00.002+02:00

Giving up...

Defeat does not finish a man – quitting does.
A man is not finished when he is defeated.
He is finished when he quits.
- Richard Nixon

So often I feel that it's just too much trouble
to carry on -
and that life is too much like hard work...

But deep inside I know there is more...
more to be
more to give
and more to receive

2008-12-09T06:12:00.004+02:00

Compliments...

Sometimes they are more difficult to receive than to give
And someone who is able to receive a compliment
is usually very self-confident

And even though some of us feel uncomfortable receiving compliments
we all know how good they make us feel
so we can understand the boost it gives

When we compliment someone on doing something good
we are expressing our appreciation
and we are showing our support for their efforts
and we are encouraging them to continue

Today we can all help make our life
and our world a better place
by displaying self-confidence and support for those around us

2008-12-08T07:29:00.002+02:00

Monday Motivator...

The only way for us to know if our choices are right for us
is to turn to our inner guide

If we know what feels right and what works for us
then it does not matter if anyone else thinks it’s impractical

We can choose any basis we like for our decision making
and we only need to explain ourselves if we want to do so

But... every choice has its consequences
and if we have considered them and can accept them
as possibilities then there is no reason not to go ahead with our choice

We are the master of our destiny
and we can make our own decisions...
because inside each of us
we have all the wisdom we need

2008-12-05T06:34:00.002+02:00

Easy Peasy...

The simple things in life are often the most wonderful
All to often I have thought that only big fancy things will bring me joy

Only to discover that the little things like
walking barefoot on grass
watching a bird in my garden
and listening to my partner laugh heartily
brings me the greatest joy

Let us try and make this a spectacular day
a joyfull day
by looking for the small stuff in our lives
the stuff that works for us
the stuff that is magical
the divine stuff
and the stuff that is possible in our lives...

2008-12-04T06:36:00.002+02:00

Hope....

So often the world and everybody around us shouts out
"Give up... give up..."

But Hope whispers...
"Try one more time..."

And most times
Hope is all we have
And we should never let go of it...

2008-12-02T21:37:00.002+02:00

I have learnt...

That however bad our circumstances
they can always get worse
and yet they will never surpass the ability
of the human spirit to rise above them...

2008-12-01T21:05:00.003+02:00

Monday Motivator...

Quiet Time...

My favourite part of the day is when I take time out...
time to be quiet
time to reach deep within myself
and experience the harmony within that silence

Within that peaceful solitude of my mind
I always become one with my Divinity...

2008-11-28T07:04:00.002+02:00

Shhhh.... Listen!

Our ability to hear is probably the weakest developed skill we have
We are born with two ears
but only one tongue
and this means that we were meant to listen
twice as much as we talk

What we learn about another person
will always result in a greater reward
than what we tell him about ourselves
We need to learn to listen and observe
and we must try harder to truly listen, and not just to hear.

2008-11-27T07:37:00.002+02:00

Our Thoughts...

We need to be more careful about what we think about
and if thinking is so powerful
as so many schools of though are suggesting
then we need to be extremely selective in our thoughts...

2008-11-26T07:24:00.002+02:00

It's never too late...

This morning I found this joke in my inbox...

Little girl, "Mummy, how soon is Christmas?"
Mother, "Not long. Why do you ask?"
Girl, "I was wondering if it was near enough for me to start being good."

2008-11-25T07:31:00.002+02:00

The other side...

There are things we cannot change
We must adjust
Sometimes the greatest change we can make is to change our viewpoint

But most of us fight against this
Our pride gets in the way
What we need to do is to make an effort to look at situations
we face from a totally different perspective
And often we are surprised by the view from the other side

We each seem to view things from our own personal point of reference
But there are always two sides to the coin
And remember nothing looks the same when viewed from a different angle

When we feel stuck
it helps to view our situation from another angle
it might just give us the new perspective we need to move ahead

2008-11-24T07:04:00.004+02:00

Monday Motivator...

Faith is taking that first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.
- Martin Luther King Jr

Once you choose Hope, anything is possible
- Christopher Reeve

Each man is the architect of his own Destiny
- Appius Caecus

Faith, Hope and Destiny - the fuel that drives me....

2008-11-21T06:15:00.002+02:00

Trial and Error...

Every mistake we make is another opportunity to become better

Life is a lifelong journey of trial and error

an opportunity to learn and grow

Depending on our attitude it's more like an opportunity

we have where we can choose to learn or not

Not everyone learns from their mistakes

Most of us actually repeat the same mistake several times

before we learn something

Some of us never learn

When problems come our way

we can to choose how to respond

We can either see them as another chance to grow

or we can complain about how unlucky we are

Ultimately it is our attitude towards these challenges

that will determine who we become

and how we live our life...

2008-11-20T06:19:00.002+02:00

Altering my Attitude...

A turning point in my life was when I discovered
that I was able to alter my life by altering my attitude

For me each day is a new opportunity to decide to have a good attitude
In the good times it is very easy have a good attitude
but when things do not go well it’s a different story
But it remains my choice whether I choose to have a bad day
or whether I choose to give it my all
and add a couple of colourful paint strokes that will eventually turn into
the master piece that is meant to be my life...

2008-11-19T06:42:00.003+02:00

Wacky Wednesdays...

Wednesdays are poised perfectly in the middle
of the beginning and the end...
A day that brings relief from Blue Mondays and holds
a promise of the imminent arrival of Fabulous Friday
and the weekend where I can spend time
with people I love and care for...

But sometimes it scares me to see how quickly time passes
I have so much to do...
so much to say...

2008-11-18T06:12:00.003+02:00

No Pain.... No Gain...

Some wise person once said;
In the presence of trouble, some people grow wings; others buy crutches

We have all heard the saying - No pain... No gain...
Body builders tell us that in order to grow those
big muscles they have
they have to push themselves beyond the pain...

And just so in life it is only when we push ourselves
beyond our comfort zone that we grow
We need to challenge ourselves
we need to move beyond our comfort zones
we need to grow wings and transcend our limitations
or...
we can buy crutches and limp along in life

When we test ourselves
and venture into unknown territory
we begin to develop ourselves
we develop our true character
and become the person we were born to be

Photo - taken in my garden

2008-11-17T07:07:00.004+02:00

Monday motivator...

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal
with the intent of throwing it at someone else;
you are the one who gets burned."
- Buddha

Letting go of past hurts has been a major
contributor to my growth and healing over the years...

Photo - taken in a garden at Hartebeespoort Dam

2008-11-15T08:46:00.010+02:00

Dear Abuser

I want to give up being a grown-up for just a week
I want to be 8 years old again
I want to think that the Wimpy is a 5 star restaurant
I want to walk barefoot through a mud puddle
And throw stones just a few meters
but believe they have travelled into the far blue yonder

I want to believe that the most important things to learn in life
is the colours
and multiplication tables
and nursery rhymes

I want to believe that anything in life is possible
and that I will be an airhostess when I grow up
I want to trust everybody
And believe that nobody will do me any harm
I want to live in a time where a hug and a smile
and a gentle voice made everything right

For just one week I do not want to worry about
my bond repayments
my credit card bills
my overdraft and doctors bills

For just one week
I want to resign from being an adult
and be 8 years old again…

I want my childhood back!

Photo - taken in my garden

2008-11-14T06:26:00.006+02:00

They say...

"The grateful mind is a great mind, and attracts to it great things."
- Plato

If it worked for Plato who am I to argue with a statement like that?

Photo - taken in my garden

2008-11-13T06:30:00.004+02:00

The Power that lies within me...

I've noticed many people on Facebook and the Blogs
declare themselves as Agnostic
- a person who believes that it is impossible to know if God exists...

And then I respectfully wonder :-)
"what planet do these people live on?"
because even though I do the Catholic thing -
I have become less enchanted with formal religion as such
But... I cannot escape the fact that there is a Higher Consciousness

I think of God as an all encompassing Universal Force -
the energy that makes up the universe...
And I believe that because I know I am made of molecules
and these molecules are made of atoms
and those atoms are made of protons neutrons and electrons
that they are elementary particles dancing a cosmic dance...

And that means that I am therefor no longer matter - but energy...

And I am exactly the same as the beautiful flower in the photo above
with one major difference....
I am energy in physical form but in addition
I have an awareness of myself...
And this awareness leads me to believe that none of this is random
and that the order in all this energy is God
and my awareness of my self is God

And then that verse in the bible makes sense...

I am created in the likeness of God...

And today... I rejoice in that fact!

Photo - taken at Walter Sisulu Gardens

2008-11-12T06:40:00.004+02:00

Great expectations...

I did not expect to find the plant in the photo above
growing out of a crack in a rock
But it happens and it is possible
My expectations of plants is that they will only grow in fertile soil
Not so....
The picture above is proof of that

And just so we tend to limit ourselves
because we expect the things in life that our brains think about
and what we think about... we attract
So the more we think about what we expect
the greater the likelihood that those expectations will be fulfilled

When we expect something exciting to happen in our lives
we feel exited....
And when we expect something bad to happen
we feel anxious...

Our expectations have an effect on our emotions
Our emotions influence our attitude
Negative expectations will result in negative emotions
which could lead to a negative attitude
which will inevitably attract a negative result...

So... I have decided to have great expectations
and I will be ready to receive it when it comes...
because I know it will...

Photo - taken in the hills above Hartebeespoort Dam

2008-11-11T06:06:00.004+02:00

Time waits for nobody...

I cannot believe how fast this year is drawing to a close and
my to-to list for this year still has way too many un-ticked items on it

For many years I did the resolutions thing and failed horribly
but when I changed my attitude
and shifted my focus from "I want to..." -
to "I am going to..."
things worked out much easier

None of us would dare go on a holiday
or get married without doing any planning
Yet so many of us go through life without a plan
Without any sense of what we want in life
and how we are going to go about getting it

We live our lives from day to day
and we often wonder what's missing
and we have a sense that there should be more...

If we do not know where we are going to
how can we expect to get there?

There are 1440 minutes in a day
and today...
I am going to use one of them to plan my day
because that is all it takes for me to decide
that today...
I am going to be grateful for my life
and this brand new day
and all the possibilities it holds for each of us...

Photo - taken of the sundial at the Walter Sisulu Gardens

2008-11-10T06:01:00.006+02:00

Monday motivator...

I have always been big on day dreaming
And then I learnt that I should put my dreams down on paper

But the hardest part is truly believing in those dreams
believing that I can make them come true
believing that I can achieve my goals
and accomplish great things
and be all I am meant to be...

It is often said that we are our own worst enemy
that we are the only thing that stands between us and our dreams

But the happenings of last week have given so many of us hope
The historic event of Barack Obama being elected as the first
black man to president of the USA has given lots of people hope

YES we can....

YES I can!!!!!!

Photo - a Daylilly in my garden

2008-11-09T07:45:00.004+02:00

Fighting friends...

My two dogs - the Mad Circus Dog and Princess Cleopatra usually sleep together
But when I opened my office curtains this morning
I noticed that the Mad Circus Dog had spent the night all alone on the patio

"Are you fighting with your sister again?" I asked him
He opened his eyes and slowly stretched and then yawned
with his usual -she started it- expression on his face...

Never go to bed on an argument my Granny had taught me
and I live by that...
I love kissing and making up
But I cannot seem to teach the Mad Circus Dog that :-)

Photo - My Dogs

2008-11-08T15:03:00.002+02:00

Duvet day...

It's a grey wet Saturday here in Johannesburg
An ideal day to spend in bed
curled up with a book

But instead I am working -
preparing for a workshop
And I do not mind at all
because I love what I do
and with that attitude it feels
like I never work a day in my life

And I am grateful...

Photo - My bedroom.

2008-11-07T06:32:00.001+02:00

Happiness is....

Being grateful for what we have!
Someone once said - "If you don't feel gratitude for what you have, what makes you think that you will be happy with more?"
Gratitude and appreciation can transform our lives
and today....
I find myself being grateful that my web page http://www.deborah.co.za/ is finally up and running even though there are still some aspects to be finalised.
Gratitude is a choice. when we make a choice to see things differently we are focusing on all the things that are good or right in our lives as opposed to focusing on things that are not.
Be grateful...
Be happy...

Photo - taken at Walter Sisulu Gardens.

2008-06-22T21:28:00.001+02:00

Introduction...

The change is inside each of us

What I make of my life depends on me...

Photo - taken at Lifestyle Garden Centre