The
trouble is it’s an area or topic nobody wants to talk about. I’m sure if I
decided to fight for the rights of animal abuse I would have a whole lot of
support... but child sexual abuse makes people cringe... It makes them go into ostrich mode. If we don’t
think about it or talk about it, it might just go away right? Not so.
The
aftermath and fallout of a child having endured sexual abuse or any other kind
of abuse will ultimately affect us all because it’s not just about sex... Have
you ever wondered why there are so many people who are angry, nasty, promiscuous,
bitter, and violent and who abuse alcohol and drugs? Go back to their childhood
and you will discover why. Many a times they themselves may not have been
abused, but they have a parent that was... and who never had the opportunity to
“work through” their issues... and the vicious cycle continues.
Children and adults who have been sexually
abused very seldom speak out about abuse. And the reasons are obvious. Most
people are abused by people they know and trust. Studies on reported abuse
cases show that:
- An estimated 60% of perpetrators of sexual abuse are known to the child but are not family members, e.g., family friends, babysitters, childcare providers, neighbours.
-
About 30% of
perpetrators are family members, e.g., fathers, brothers, uncles, cousins.
- Just 10% of perpetrators are strangers to the child.
Sadly here in South Africa just a fraction of that 10% is
reported in the media and for the most part the other is kept hush-hush for fear
of a family scandal or because the adults don’t want to offend their neighbours
or acquaintances. Adults always seem to choose self preservation above the
wellbeing of children. Just look at the way some schools treat reports of
teachers sexually abusing their learners. The reputation of the schools is much
more important.
And the silence continues...
Silence however only serves to perpetuate the abuse. It is
time we move “Beyond the Silence”...
Stories
have always been a very effective tool of persuasion. They have been used to
convey messages and influence behaviours since before the written word and I
believe strongly that survivors should be telling their stories and offering
hope to those who find themselves in seemingly hopeless situations.
I thread telling my story and my fight to move from victim to survivor to thriver with the facts about child abuse so that the audience are given the knowledge that can help them prevent the abuse of our children.
I have spent the past couple of years putting together a workshop and fact sheets and have presented this to groups of people. My aim however is to now do this fulltime. But if I want to make a difference at all I will need schools to buy into this and get the teachers and parents to attend. I need employers to get me to address their workers during working hours. I need NGO's working in the area of child services to see the benefits of joining me in a partnership and I need YOUR support please.
My wish
list:
·
Printing of fact sheets, brochures and business cards and
stationary
·
A banner
·
Names and contacts of people I can approach about hosting a
talk or workshop
3 comments:
I'm wishing you well in spreading the truth. As one whohad a childhood free from abuse I can only vaguely imagine the horror for those who are abused. Your bravery in working to expose the situations and ensure people get HELP is admirable.
As and when I can think of people to involve I will let you know.
Thank you kindly :-)
I left a comment of FB, but to expand one of my subjects next year is sexual abuse which has a big assignment and I would really like speak to you about it.
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